Putting the cart before the horse, adventures in ignorance.

Graham was involved in the first five years of establishing “Long Whatton New Baptist Church” in Leicestershire. He reflects on his experience as a novice and somewhat arrogant church planter.

The more I talk to people who are church planting, the more confused I get about my identity. It's not just that I am jealous of the blood and the sweat. The exhaustion and the fun. The thrill and the frustration. The feeling of breaking into new ground and the disappointments. The joy of seeing people grow in their understanding of Jesus and the Christian faith. No, I think what I struggle with most is coming to terms with the fact that I'm not a church planter any more. I was, and I probably will be again (God willing), but at the moment I ... I ... am ... well ... not planting a new church ... as such.

My church planting journey began about 1996 when I was part of a vibrant, charismatic, enthusiastic, Baptist community. We were a group of people that desperately wanted to make a difference in our area. We knew the stories of the Evangelical Revival and we wanted the same thing. We cried out to God for it. We pleaded with him to open the gates of heaven and bless us with “souls” and “fruit that will last”. I've cried myself horse in many prayer meetings asking God to do a miracle. One of our group came back from a denominational meeting (most of us didn't really know we were part of something bigger) and told us that up the road the Baptist Church had closed amid a bitter dispute. They were, we were informed, going to sell the building. I visited the village and amid the sadness about this churches story, a desire to see a church planted in this village began to grow. The village had 600 houses and already had two other active but arguably introspective Christian communities. The church leaders had begun to feel the same way and a vision was born for a “new” church.

We set about renovating the building (it is what you need when you plant a church isn't it?). We poured time and effort into it and ended up with a lovely renovated 18th Century Chapel. We envisioned the “Mother” church and about 30 people felt called by God to become part of this pioneering work. We launched the new church one easter Sunday with great celebration and enthusiasm. I led the team and together we engaged in all kinds of different forms of evangelism. It was an exciting time, but as one year led to another and as people's enthusiasm began to wain. The core team began to reduce in number and few people from the village attended the services. As Louise and I worked, walked and prayed our way around the village, we began to wonder what was wrong.

It has been observed that some pain could be saved in the church planting journey by drawing upon the resources that are available (Murray, Church Planting, p.33). Caught up in my Charismatic fervour and excitement I had no time for theories or strategies. God had told me to plant a church, and I was going to start with Sunday worship and I didn't care for any distracting wisdom. The more I think about it the more I shudder at my arrogance.

I learned some key and significant personal lessons over those years:

• Never isolate yourself... remain accountable, not only to a group you know, but also gain a wider accountability with experienced people.
• Never put the cart before the horse... always build community before buildings.
• Never expect God to do all the work... there is no such thing as easy mission or evangelism.
• Never expect everyone to be as committed as you are... some will be, but others won't.

They were all painful lessons. Fortunately my vision for mission and evangelism changed from an attractional 18th Century Church planting model, to a more mission orientated, incarnational model. Unfortunately I lacked the experience and knowledge to know how to communicate it to the team I was working with. In many ways my failure in communication led to my feeling the need to move on when the first season of the churches life began to move into the next.

There were, of course, some great moments. Witnessing two people express their new found faith and commitment in Baptism was fantastic. One of them went on to get married, and we had the pleasure of hosting the wedding ceremony. That was a brilliant day! Being involved with the local school and with many other people who didn't regularly go to church (though most would have called themselves Christian) were great experiences.

I learned some really helpful things about the nature of God:

• He uses whatever you offer him... it will be flawed but he will use it anyway!
• He will always surprise you... it might not be what you expect but it will be a surprise!
• He allows us to make mistakes... hopefully we learn from them!

At the moment I am making a foray into the life of the established Baptist church. My life is consumed by many of the same issues that concerned me when I was church planting and all those lessons I learned have been very useful. Being in a long established church presents its own challenges for mission and engagement with the local community. The blood and the sweat. The exhaustion and the fun. The thrill and the frustration. The feeling of breaking into new ground and the disappointments. The joy of seeing people grow in their understanding of Jesus and the Christian faith are all part of my experience. In many ways it feels like I am church planting, seeing new things grow and working with experienced Christians to see the Kingdom of God break in. However, sometimes it feels like I have moved away from the coal face, which is why I am confused about my identity.

Did I plant a church, or am I a church planter?